Observing Communication

About a week ago, I was at the laundry mat washing my comforters and I noticed this young lady and her son on the other side of the laundry mat. The mom looked to be in her early twenties and about six months pregnant. The little boy could not have been any more than about four or five years old. At this age, children are active and very talkative. He would ask the mom a question and she would tell him to set down and shut-up. At first, I did not pay much attention their conversation, until maybe about the fifth time I heard him say, “Mom I got to use it.” She than said to him again, “You better sit there and be quit, before I spank your butt, with your ugly butt” (another choice of words, but will not say)” The little boy seemed to be very sad and afraid of the mom. He probably needed to use the restroom for a while but was too afraid to ask. I’m the first to not intervene into other people business, but it took everything in me not to say something to this mother.

  

What I gathered form this communication observation is that the mother is very young and do not have much parenting skills and her patience is very short. This child is growing up with a parent who degrades him and makes him feel unworthy. Children need to know who they are, respected and grounded in themselves (Laureate, Lisa Kolbeck, 2010).

What the parent should have done is listen to what the child was saying, and not shut him out. Children should never be closed off with walls of our assumptions (Laureate, Lisa Kolbeck, 2010). It seemed as though the child did not even exist to the mother. A child needs to be heard, instead of just being seen.

As an early childhood educator it is crucial that we break the barriers of ineffective communication, especially with children. I refuse to be that parent I witnessed in the laundry mat. Children need to feel that their voice will be heard at all times in our schools, home daycare  and in early educational programs; if this is not demonstrated early in life than as they become older, they will feel inadequate in their communication skills.

I was raised in a very loving environment but my father felt that children should be seen and not heard, and for many years I would allow things to transpire in my own life; whether it was on my job or in my personal relationships and would not address the issues because I was afraid of losing my job, friends, or an significant other. I had to learn what effective healthy communication really was, and now that I know and understand how important it is, I reflect that in my everyday world. My reflection is looking in the faces of children and seeing myself as a child. This helps me to understand that children are just little people who communicate differently from adults, but communicate the best they know how. When an environment is created for children to feel welcome, love and safe than they feel accepted; this opens doors for them to communicate freely.    

Reference

Laureate Education, Inc. (Executive Producer). (2011). Welcome to an anti-bias learning community [video]. Strategies for Working with Diverse Children. Baltimore, MD: Author.

Creating Affirming Environments

An environment rich in anti-bias materials invites exploration and discovery and supports children’s play and conversations in both emergent and planned activities (Derman-Sparks &Olsen, 2010).

Presenting anti-bias education is important when working with diverse children and families. We live in such an ever changing world; therefore our early education programs need to change as well. Families need to see that their cultural is being presented and welcome in our early education programs. An anti-bias environment is also culturally consistent for the children and families it currently serves. In other words, anyone who is in your program at the time should feel comfortable (Derman-Sparks & Olsen, (2010).

Children and Families have questions like; does this place remind me enough of my home and my community that I feel belong here and will be cared for and safe? And this is the type of environment that early education programs should present to them.

In my classrooms, I try to implement a first bias-free environment, while demonstrating diversity throughout the classrooms. In my library area, I have books, and posters that represent families from all over the country and books that illustrate diversity. In home /family living my dolls represent diversity and the play foods are generated from American, Asian to Mexican foods.

My Family communication board represents all of my children families and culture’s. Families can also see our daily calendar that have the menu of what children are being served each day. I also pass out family communication sheets daily to give families a general idea of what children are doing throughout the day. My music area has pictures of children of different cultural backgrounds singing together, and music of diverse children. I even brought a song in that states, “We are children that comes from all around the world; Black and White, girls and boys.” In my block area, there are diverse children, men and women representing different cultural groups. When children see other cultural groups other than their own, they learn the meaning of what it is to be different is really about.

The resources inspired me to be more aware of demonstrating an anti-bias environment. As an early educator, I have learned that all families want and need is for their children to be in a loving, safe and welcoming environment and every early child care program should offer these type of services. And because children bring differences and such uniqueness to early education programs, educators must be able to promote these differences, not just demonstrated in the classrooms but also in teaching an anti-bias curriculum.   

Resource

    Derman-Sparks, L., & Olsen Edwards, J. (2010). Anti-bias education for young children and ourselves. Washington, D.C.: National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC).

"Welcome to an Anti-Bias Learning Community".  Laureate Education, Inc. (2010).